The fruits of my labor

So I was on Facebook today and saw that a friend had tagged me in a comment. I go to the comment and what do I see but a publicity poster for Checking Out! It is really cool! I feel like a real live playwright now.

Kind of hard to think right now as I have an audition coming up in about an hour. It's for Company, being done by HDCP. The format of the audition is cool; we have to bring in a monologue and sing a song. I've done MANY auditions where a monologue was required. All my auditions at Michigan, my auditions for grad school, and my auditions for pro theaters here required monologues. This one had to be only 30-60 seconds long. I had a hard time finding one that short. I ended up putting one together from several smaller speeches in Jeffrey. It's a pretty crazy one.

My song is That'll Show Him from Forum. She wanted us to pick a Sondheim song. I've done it for auditions before and I worked with Kelly on it, so I feel pretty good about it. I think I'll go over it a few more times and then go.

I finished the first Act II scene and am into the first SB scene. Nice.

Breakthrough, kinda

I wrote a bit today! I'm planning to write more soon. Mom and I talked about the craft of writing, how I needed to do it every day. Dave says this in CO as well, that he works hard every day. We saw Hugo and it's all about working, that we are all part of a machine and there are no extra pieces. We all have a job to do. And my job is to write. So I've set the goal of working every day.

I decided it's too hard to make myself go to Interval every Monday. So I'm going to another class, an aerobics class, at Parkwood. I want to take a Pilates class there too and stick with the S and S. So that will be the three classes I will take next semester. I haven't run but I have done the Arc Trainer. My weight seems to have stabilized at 150, but I have set a goal of losing 10 pounds by April Fool's Day.

It is the Nurse who suggests the name of Konstantinos. That occurred to me this morning. Mornings are good epiphany times for me. I think that's why I sleep in so often. I do my best writing when I first wake up. There is a time after which it's just harder to write, about 8 or 9. Last night I wanted to write but it was too late.

This first Act II scene takes up about two pages so far. I want to write another two pages today, or at least one page. I'd like it to be a five-page scene. After this, I want to have the other siblings and Haemon arrive in SB. I see the stage as divided in half, lit to create two spaces. A designer can do a lot with light and sound. Set should be minimal, mostly chairs and tables. Tiresias can be in the middle or off to the side. Originally I envisioned her/him off to the side, but it might be more interesting to put him/her in the center, since s/he lies between the action.

Okay, time to get back to it.

Mired

The relationship is over. Sad. I have to keep creating, though. Dave in CO says nothing else matters when he is writing, that writing is his true love. I get that way sometimes.

However, I'm blocked as far as Monsters is concerned. I'm using Konstantinos but I haven't gotten any farther. I remember long periods when I didn't or couldn't work on CO so I may just need a break. Writing takes time. It's also hard to keep from languishing in FB and not trying to write. I don't do well with disciplined writing. It seems to either come or not. I should probably take time every day to at least try.

Workouts are going well. There's a new woman doing Strength and Stretch. I went Friday and had a good workout. Sunday I did the ArcTrainer and today I rode the bike. The SparkPeople program is great. I spent some time tonight looking through healthy recipes on the site. My eating has been not so great but I'm going to try to do better.

I'll be home for Thanksgiving and I'll try to eat healthy then. I'm making butternut squash from a recipe in the SparkPeople collection. I have just recently discovered butternut squash and I LOVE it. It's easy to make, too.

So, I'm having vegetable fried rice for dinner and trying to create later tonight. We'll see.

Unblock coming..?

I didn't run today but I did do ArcTrainer, and I'm feeling pretty good. Auditions for "R and G" are tonight. I've been doing other things on the computer today--not only Facebooking but working on a new site called Spark People. It's a way to keep a record of your nutrition and fitness. I found out that I'm not eating nearly enough and not getting enough carbs (by far) or protein. Today I'm better-just about perfect on the carbs and getting there on the protein-fat relationship.

Ismene is the only sibling to escape death in the original cycle, so I can keep that. Haemon kills himself in "Antigone" but I don't think I'll have him die in my version. There are two suicides in "Monsters" ,however.

The lovers have to decide on a name for the baby. I was kicking around Adelphos (sibling) and Baltasar (king of Babylon before its fall). Kris suggested Konstantinos. I kind of like that. "Steadfast, constant." I wanted something that would be kind of ironic, but maybe a more hopeful name is better. The kids have a lot of hope that gets dashed as their fates unfold.

I'm feeling like I could write a monologue tonight. Not necessarily when I get done here, but maybe when I get home from the bar (we're going for a drink after auditions). I wonder, if I get in the show, if that can spur me creatively. Stoppard is fun to read and I'm sure fun to do. Sometimes being exposed to a great writer makes me a better writer myself. It will be the third really well-written show I've done this year. It would be so great!

**Other news: I changed my relationship status on FB today and got SO many "likes". I'm really happy they're happy, and it's good to be happy myself. It's nice to have someone I can bounce ideas off of and someone to offer suggestions. Perhaps my new relationship with Kris will help get me past my writer's block. :)

No prayers for November to linger longer....

I was surprised to see I hadn't written since September. October was completely taken up by Conspiracy. I have gone from one show to another since March. I have some downtime now but that may be over soon if I get cast in Rosencrantz and Guildenstern.

I've been having severe writer's block. I've started the first scene of the second act, but it's been hard going. The dialogue between Tig, Poly, and Oedipus is tricky to navigate. He doesn't condone what they've done but he still loves them. He and Poly have the same challenges as far as their sight is concerned and I want to bring that out.

I read the Theban cycle and it was an eye-opener. I've forgotten a lot about the story. First of all, I forgot Haemon was Creon's son. This is a very helpful way to explain what he's doing there--before he was just sort of hanging out. I find it interesting that Tig and Haemon are first cousins. I guess the Greeks didn't consider that relationship too close to be incest. It's not considered incest in Mansfield Park, either, so...maybe it's not that big a deal. But I like the idea of bringing it up, so I will stick to the original as far as his relationship to Antigone is concerned.

Oedipus at Colonus takes place between Oedipus the King and Antigone. The girls are in it but not the boys. Polynices is actually the older brother. Oedipus is "taken" at his death, disappearing and leaving no corpse. I find this really interesting. I may use that somehow.

Of course, in the original Poly and Teo are dead at the beginning of Antigone. In my version, the battle is a debate and neither of them dies at the end of it. But they are doomed in my version nonetheless. None of them can escape their fate--except Ismene. I may change my mind about that, even.

So, again, I know where it's going to go but I just have to get there. I haven't been running much and that may be making a difference. Maybe the creative juices haven't been flowing because I've been avoiding being physical. I've gained 6 pounds since May, when I was in Guys and Dolls. I need to get back on track with the eating and the working out. It's just hard with the show and the weather, too. It's been so cold and grey. Bad excuses, I know.

So tomorrow I will try to run and maybe spend some time working. I've been spending altogether way too much time on FB. It's sucking my soul dry. I'm still hoping for revealing dreams but the only dreams I've had recently have been about my dad in drag and getting a hamburger at the Soup Spoon. I have a new romantic interest in my life, which is not only nice from a relationship standpoint but also good in a creative way--he's been reading and critiquing my work, as I have his.

So I think it's time to sign off for the night. Too late to start working now, although I might try to write a few lines. Tomorrow, as the lady says, is another day.

And it begins again...

I'm approaching writing this play in a whole new way. Never before have I blogged, journaled, or taken notes on the story. I'm trying to get things flowing so I'm choosing a new angle. The characters speak to me in the individual scenes, but it's hard to find the shape of the whole play.

I wrote a monologue by the "new Tiresias" on Saturday. This weekend was the CTAM fall conference and I met a lot of people in community theater around Michigan. I passed out cards but didn't have near enough. I did, however, give the CTAM president one. We had a nice conversation about the playwrighting contest and he said he was looking forward to reading CO. The contest is in May.

I'm not revising the first act any more. I think that was my way of stalling. I need to figure out how to spin out the second act. I have certain events that I need to have happen; the rest is stringing them together.

I have yet to read the cycle of plays. I think I'll go to Schuler's and buy them. Maybe I will devote this week to reading them. That will surely give me an idea of where to go next.

Well, I'm getting pretty tired. I have a lot to process for this weekend. I may not get to writing tomorrow, but I'll try. Definitely going to Schuler's first.

Ahhh...

Finished Act I! I finally figured out a way to send Tig and Poly into the water. They "wade" on their knees and he "floats" on his back. It's a good addition to the scene. And then Oedipus at the end.

The Nurse is featured throughout the rest of Act II but I had nothing to do with Cora/Housekeeper. However, something occurred to me today. A friend read what I had so far a few days ago and told me that Tiresias is actually both male and female. So I will have the actress playing Cora and the Housekeeper play Tiresias in the second act! Cool, huh?

I'm revising the first act before I finish the play, which I don't usually do. I'm mostly cutting out sentences and changing words, not making big changes. I think I like the scenes where they are. Act II may be more demanding in terms of putting the scenes in the right order. I have to do the arrival in Santa Barbara, setting up house there, maybe taking them to a state park, Tig and Poly reestablishing their relationship with Oedipus as adults, Antigone growing, and Tiresias interjecting monologues. I may write a monologue between the train scene and the beach scene in Act I; I need it if I am to follow the pattern.

It took me a good fifteen minutes to read the first scene. Granted, I close read it, but it showed me that the play may indeed be longer than I first thought. If it takes that long to read a (granted, long) scene, then I may have a slightly longer play than I anticipated. Sounds good to me.

There may be more California scenes than Greece scenes. Not sure why I get that feeling.

Well, I'm going to continue reading and changing little bits as I go along. Later...

Life's a beach

Having a little trouble with the Greece scene. I've got Tig and Poly on the beach, just a stone's throw from Oedipus' house. Antigone is apprehensive about seeing her father again. They've stopped to rest and are talking about picking up playing instruments again. There is a theme of exploring senses other than sight in their scenes, since Poly is blind. Tig tries to get him to appreciate his other senses and he is beginning to appreciate them in this scene. He is starting to get away from the self-pity and bitterness he first felt about his blindness.

So I have them sitting here talking and I'm stuck. If it were a film, I could send them into the water, but that's not easy to do on stage. I have seen it done before, in As You Like It at Stratford. The actor laid on his back and "floated" while lights suggested the rest. I really like the idea of sound and lights being a central part of this play. I'd love to figure out a way to send them into the ocean.

After I get this scene done, I'm printing out the first act. Then I may leave it til October. Maybe I'll dream about it. A friend says if you think about your problem before bed, you may dream a solution to it. I think I'm going to have longer scenes in the second act, as I've said. That will be a challenge for me. Maybe my increase in running workouts will help. I ran today but I haven't written at all. So I'm here. Probably sitting at Biggby trying to write is not the best idea. There's too much stimulation. The music is too loud and the chairs are too hard. Starbucks was better but I prefer to patronize smaller businesses. Maybe I'll try Gone Wired next time. That's kind of out of my way, though. I guess I'm best off just writing at home.

OyamO, my playwrighting prof at Michigan, said "Don't write a part for a specific actor; write it for a good actor." That's what I do, but knowing so many actors in the area, it's hard to avoid thinking of certain people for roles. I guess it boils down to asking certain people to audition when it comes time. FB invites are a great thing. I refuse to put pressure on a director one way or the other, but I have to say...I do know people that would be really good in certain roles. Ah, well. Back to the beach.

Pardon me, boy...

Finished the train scene. I read it aloud and it's about 7 minutes. So the page/minute measurement is a little off in my favor. I have ONE MORE scene to write to complete Act I--the scene where Tig and Poly arrive in Greece. This scene will introduce the Nurse, played by the actress who plays Eurydice, and Oedipus, played by the actor who plays Creon.

I'm starting to get a better idea of the shape. Act I sets everything up and promises hope for the future. Act II is a process of unraveling. Things don't go well.

Not sure if I want to keep the alternating scenes up. I'm thinking not. It would get tedious after a while. Maybe I will write longer scenes with more unity of place.

Although I want to work more, I think it's time to put 'er to bed. Tomorrow, as the lady says, is another day.

Fate, fate, and more fate

Working on the train scene. I wrote a Tiresias monologue and shifted to the three youths on the train to SB. There's a memory bit with Ismene and Creon where she liberates herself from him. That was a nice surprise. I've written about a page this morning and the scene is about three pages long so far. I'd like to get two more pages done to finish the scene. Right now the script is 30 pages. I wanted the first act to be 45 pp. but it looks like it'll be closer to 35 or 40 at the most. I think each page is more than a minute, though. It would take a reading to really find out.

My typing is getting faster. Good thing. I took a typing test a while back and I was only at 50 wpm. I think I'm at about 60 now. I can type almost as fast as I think. I look at the cursor and the words, so that's better for working on original stuff. Transcribing is harder.

I got a thumb drive yesterday. I wanted to have a backup of the play in case Dora (my computer) died. I love thumb drives! They are so easy to use. If I spill water or something on Dora, I can take the thumb drive to Kinko's and make a copy of the script. It was pretty cheap too--11 bucks for 4 gigs. I would have to write a lot of plays to fill that...!

I'm hoping I'm not beating the theme of fate into the ground. That seems to be all the three youths are talking about in this scene. The part with Creon is a departure, but most of the scene goes: "Can you change things...what is fate and what is chance...how do decisions figure in all this..." blah blah blah. Monsters is not so much about people sitting around talking as in CO, but it's still pretty wordy. I guess language is the most important element in my plays. It's what I look at when I read, and so that comes through in my work.

I want to work on Ismene and Haemon's budding relationship and its opposition to Tig and Poly's incestuous one. What do they have in common and how do they differ? And how does Teo come into all of this? He is the odd man out as far as love is concerned. His "fate" is also different from the others...in the way it unfolds. Trying not to give too much away, but it's hard!

And on another note...I watched the Michigan game in between writing last night and all I have to say is GO BLUE!

More later...maybe a progress report on the train scene...

Closer and closer all the time

I've come so far since I started writing about Monsters. I've finished the Housekeeper scene, which was a lot easier to write because there were four people to bounce off each other. I copied and pasted the cabin scene so it comes after the Housekeeper scene. I want to go back and forth between the two groups. The next scene is on the train and then the last scene in the act takes place in Greece. So it looks like I might have Act I finished before the end of September! That would be awesome.

The characters are really forming nicely and finding their own voices. They each said what they were supposed to in the Housekeeper scene. What I mean by that is there would be a line that I knew someone had to say and the perfect voice came forward for that particular line.


Ismene, Eteocles, and Haemon pick a random city to go to in California, Santa Barbara. I decided what was going to happen to Teo and did a little research into something...that I don't want to go in to. Suffice it to say that Santa Barbara in the mid-twenties is a perfect place for them to be.

This play is turning out a little like that horror movie where the characters avoid a terrible accident and then they all die in other ways throughout the movie. Not sure what that was called. I don't think that will be a concern. It's silly and just a coincidence.

I want this one to be part of a school curricula. It may sound grandiose, but I think the themes and language make it a play worthy of study. Checking Out is a fun light comedy, but Monsters is more brainy; I could see it being included in a syllabus someday. I had a flash of my old U of M senior seminar professor using it in his class. Silly...but who knows?

I wrote that whole Housekeeper scene today and I'm just best. Gonna take the rest of the night off, maybe do some laundry or clean. No rehearsal tonight. I have the whole weekend to write. Maybe I'll write the train scene. That would be a good goal: write the train scene over the weekend. I think I'll try to do just that. Write and ride at the gym tomorrow, run and write Sunday.

I ran today too, since the Strength and Stretch instructor didn't show up. Our other instructor isn't doing it any more and apparently they don't have anyone new. I was there and prepared to run, so I did that instead. Maybe that freed me up to write this whole scene today. I really think there is a body/mind connection.

Well, I'm off to explore other things for my evening. I have Chinese food coming and I want to sweep and mop the kitchen floor, at least. Attagirl...

Dreaming of the man I love

Someday he'll come along, The man I love
And he'll be big and strong, The man I love
And when he comes my way
I'll do my best to make him stay
He'll look at me and smile, I'll understand
Then in a little while, He'll take my hand
And though it seems absurd
I know we both won't say a word

Maybe I shall meet him Sunday,
Maybe Monday, maybe not
Still I'm sure to meet him one day
Maybe Tuesday will be my good news day

He'll build a little home, That's meant for two
From which I'll never roam, Who would, would you
And so all else above
I'm dreaming of the man I love

Soooo....I guess I changed my mind...The Man I Love was written in the mid-twenties and has more of the "sound" I'm looking for...kind of wistful. Ain't Misbehavin' is just a little more upbeat, and I think TMIL has a slightly lazier and melancholy tone to it. Antigone's found her man, of course, but it's still a lovely song and I think perfect for a quiet moment between them.

I feel like I can write today, so I'm going to do the best I can here in a minute. I don't know how far I can get, but I'd like to get at least a page in. Maybe two. It would make me very happy if I could end the scene today.

I might as well grab the day for as much writing as I can. I forgot it was Labor Day and that the gym would be closed, so I have more time to write. I could get a run in and I have rehearsal tonight, so I don't have to lose the day. I took a bath last night but didn't devote any down time to thinking about the play...I needed more time away from it. But today I'm refreshed and ready to attack it again.

It's time...

Misbehavin'

No one to talk with, all by myself
No one to walk with, but I'm happy on the shelf
Ain't misbehavin', I'm savin' my love for you.
I know for certain the one I love
I'm through with flirtin', it's just you I'm thinkin' of
Ain't Misbehavin', I'm savin' my love for you.
Like Jack Horner in the corner
don't go nowhere, what do I care
Your kisses are worth waitin' for . . . Believe me.
I don't stay out late, don't care to go
I'm home about 8, just me and my radio
Ain't Misbehavin', I'm savin' my love for you

"Ain't Misbehavin'" was written by Fats Waller in 1929. I heard it today in Starbuck's and I guess it stuck in my subconscious. Almost everything else I found that I liked was written in the 30s or later. This is perfect. I was thinking the play would be set closer to the beginning of the 20s but setting it at the end is interesting too--thinking of how close to the Crash it is and how that adds to the sense of impending doom. It gives me a concrete year to set it in, and the excesses of the decade leave the time and people jaded. It's just a really interesting idea.

I've been away from the play for a few days being in Kalamazoo and all. I wanted to give myself a break so I could come back to it refreshed. Now that I have the song I have somewhere to go. I imagine I can get two more good pages in this scene.

One of the Merchant peeps is a writer so I sent what I have so far to him. I'm hoping we can help each other with our work (he's writing right now too). I know of a couple other writers in my circle of friends so maybe we can form some kind of writing group. That might be a good way for us to all help each other.

Okay, time for a bath and more thinking. I'm also keeping a journal with more stream of consciousness notes. I feel like I've never worked on a play so hard as I'm working on this one. I hope it pays off.

What to expect when you're expecting

Gosh, I know NOTHING about being pregnant. I actually had to look up the week-by-week schedule of what happens on the Internet. Embarrassing. However, I know a lot of women who have been pregnant, so I guess I can go to them for help. I needed to know how soon a woman would feel a kick and if someone could feel the baby moving in the early stages of pregnancy. I'm pretty clueless about the whole thing, obviously. I also don't know how long a transatlantic trip would take in the 1920s. I didn't find anything online about that. I facebooked a friend who worked on cruise ships to see if she had any idea. She didn't know but guessed a month. That sounds about right.

Okay, so cluelessness aside, I did get a lot of work done yesterday. Ended up writing *two* pages. Haven't had much luck today, though. I'm thinking of having her sing to him...so I need to write a song now. Or maybe I can find one online. What would we do without the Internet?

*I think I only need about two pages more. That would make the scene five pages, which is about average.*

I think the penultimate scene will be between Ismene and Oedipus. That's Oedipus at Colonus. In the original trilogy, she is the only one who survives. So...Not to give too much away, but I think the other three will succumb to their fate. One of the questions of the play, as laid out already, is whether our lives are laid out by fate or if we can choose our own destiny.

If you could sum up the idea behind Checking Out, it would be that we all have a right to love and be loved. Marriage dealt with the changing nature of love. Like Drag, Monsters does not deal as directly with love, but the theme is still there. In some ways it can contribute to the monstrosity, in other ways it holds the possibility for light. Antigone and Polynices' unconventional love may be very hard to take for some, especially people who have had experiences with incest. I've tried to make it about desire rather than something sinister. They talk about how being related seems to add to their love rather than turn it into something monstrous. I've been involved with victims of incest more than once and I know this would strike a nerve. But I'm trying to write it as a love story and avoid the grotesque. It's consensual and very different from the forced relationship depicted by Creon and Ismene.

So, I'm getting into writing about themes and details today. I still don't know the next line all the time, but keeping this stuff clear in my head will help me build, I think. Just gotta keep chugging away. I'm now going to get my head in rehearsals by going to get some of the makeup our costume/makeup designer wants us to have for the show. Til tomorrow, then.

I'm on a boat!

I've set myself a goal of having the first act written by the end of September. There are 7 scenes total in the act; I have written 3 of them. The act ends with the entrance of Oedipus. The next scene I was going to write was to take place at Tiresias' house where Ismene, Eteocles, and Haemon question the Housekeeper, but the scene with Tig and Poly in their cabin overruled this decision.

That was because I got a good image: the two of them in bed in the aftermath of making love. When Marriage was staged, my artistic director got very frustrated because there was a bed in the first scene only and he thought it was cumbersome. Now I realize a bed can just be a platform with a sheet over it. I want the set pieces to be minimal--chairs and a table for the first two scenes, a platform for Eteocles in the tomb scene, and the same platform in the cabin scene. I like using lights to create spaces, and I envision this happening a lot. The production team can work out the logistics of all this. It doesn't have to be a problem.

Now I'm having a hard time stretching that scene. They start out talking about the baby and what it's like to not be able to see. I want them to talk about Oedipus and what Greece will be like. I wrote a half a page yesterday and I'd like to write another page today. The play is 17 pages so far. It's very condensed--a lot takes place in that time. I'm assuming a page per minute so that's about 20 minutes. I want each act to be about 45 minutes, with a total run time of 105 minutes (1 and 3/4 hr). So, short but sweet. It's just hard for me to see it running any longer. Maybe it will bump up once I know where it's going a little bit more.

Revisiting the original story will help. This whole thing started with the conflict between the two brothers in the original. Eteocles is buried in state while Polynices is left for the daws to peck at. Antigone intervenes with disastrous results. I believe she hangs herself at the end. So...! be prepared for some tears.

I think I may read the whole trilogy: Oedipus, Antigone, and Oedipus at Colonus.

Some thoughts on the Housekeeper:
Originally I wanted her to speak a kind of broken English like Sara does in CO, but I don't think that would work now. None of the other adults speak that way. It might be too cliche' to have the "woman from the old country" be more foreign than the others who came from the same place.

She's played by the same actress who plays Cora, so the actress can have some fun differentiating the two characters. The Housekeeper will start out wary of the three young people, but she will open up once she realizes who they are. She will tell them what happened to Tiresias and help them get their money. Can't see this scene taking too long...

And what about Tiresias? I have to figure out where he's gone and how much the Housekeeper will tell the kids. I'm quite happy to keep him in limbo, delivering monologues in a spot. He's not the narrator, more like a commentator.

I was worried about the spare dialogue in scene 3, that it was too different from the dialogue in the first two scenes. I'm not too worried about it now. It's started to settle into a comfortable rhythm, my voice coming out rather than Beckett's or something. It's spare because the characters are talking to each other as people who have known each other for a long time. The dialogue in scene 4 is more full. More like the beginning.

I'm sitting here with my coffee, having put off going to my exercise class and deciding to go for a run instead. I think that helps free things up. It's a great day for a run--sunny and not stifling. What a wonderful time to hatch a play...when the earth is changing and the air has a bite to it. And rehearsals are going so well. The guys really found some good moments last night. James knows how to pull their best work out of them.

I need to get on with my day. I'd love to just sit and write all day, but there's other things that need doing. Hopefully this won't take care of my life. I once wrote a monologue on a piece of register tape when I was working at Express in SF. Can't do that anymore...or can I? ;)

Attagirl...

Okay is okay!

Progress report:

I have a habit of not doing enough research for a play. This time I want to explore a little more in that regard. I use the word "okay" several times and wanted to know if that word was used in the 20s. I did a little Internet digging and found that it was first used in 1838. It was also used in WW I to mean "0 killed." So that's really exciting since I refer to WW I several times.

I also found some other good words I'm going to use: attagirl (meaning go girl), all wet (meaning all wrong--but I'm giving it a double meaning at one point), corked (drunk), What's eating you? (also used to mean two things in the play), and okay.

Something cool to impress your friends: The word "upchuck" goes all the way back to the 20s! I did not know that!

So there's 12 characters in the play, but only 9 actors. How did I manage that? Through the magic of double casting! Here's how it works:

Antigone
Polynices
Eteocles
Ismene
Haemon
Tiresias
Creon/Oedipus
Eurydice/Nurse
Cora/Housekeeper

I don't think nine actors is too much. Less than Checking Out! A good number for a community theater or a professional theater. I may find it doesn't work for a lot of playwrighting contests, but it may be "okay" for some. :)

I made some discoveries last night. I want to keep some as surprises. One I will disclose is that the last scene goes allllll the way back to when Oedipus is saying goodbye to his children.

The scenes are short, episodic in nature. I have a hard time writing long scenes--CO has the longest scenes of any play I've written. Lots of good writers (coughShakespearecough) write short scenes (I don't mean to compare myself to him in any way, don't worry!).

The hardest part is staring at that blinking cursor. I went for a run last night to clear my head, and I think that freed something up. Then I sat in the bath with one of my 10 cent bath cubes I got at the LCP rummage sale and made notes. Some very sad things are going to happen in this play. Sorry. It is a Greek tragedy, after all!

Back to the grind...attagirl...

And we're back.

I had abandoned this blog because I was tired of just cataloguing events in my life. I know blogs can be about anything but I wanted to do something...more. And I think I've found out what that is.

Checking Out has been selected to be part of LCP's 2011-2012 season. It's going up in Spring 2012. We've got a great director and a new auditorium. Everyone has been hoping LCP will "rise from the ashes" and I think we've got a good chance of doing that. For both selfish and selfless reasons, I want LCP to survive.

So now, I'm working on a new play, and this brings me to the new purpose of this blog. This one is called Monsters; it's a reenvisioning of the Antigone story. It's set very loosely in the 20s--a favorite era of mine--and leaps from one location to another, suggested by very minimal set and lighting that creates different spaces. In this version, Antigone and Polynices are lovers and Creon has been sexually abusing Ismene. Haemon is a drunk and Tiresias is ignored by the rest of the family as he tries to warn them of their monstrous fate. The first scene is a party at Creon's estate in America that gets out of hand and ends with Polynices shooting Eteocles and Eteocles blinding Polynices. Eteocles is taken to the hospital and Antigone takes Polynices to Tiresias' house, where they are helped by his housekeeper to get to Greece.

The second scene takes place four hours earlier, setting things in motion retrospectively (I was in my Caryl Churchill phase when I first began this play in San Francisco). We learn at the end that Antigone is pregnant with Polynices' child.

I thought that would be a great ending to this short play that was one of a cycle of Greek tragedies I wrote long ago and far away. But Mom recently reminded me that a writer doesn't rest on her laurels and so I dusted it off. It's always fascinated me and I want to see how far I can go with it.

The third scene, moving chronologically again now, takes place in the tomb where the family has placed Eteocles. We hear him screaming in the dark as he realizes that he's not crazy or dead, but has been left for dead. Ismene enters and calms him, telling him his heart had stopped and the family thought he was dead.

*I want to leave certain mysteries alone; I don't want to get into explaining what happened to Teo or the mechanics of death or supposed death. I find leaving it alone makes things more interesting for the actor, the director, and the audience.*

Haemon, who has stopped drinking, enters and is astounded to see Eteocles. Ismene gets them to focus and shows them a passageway out. They spend the next part of the scene talking and walking, possibly through the audience.

Ismene is changed. She starts out shy and kind of whiny, but she starts to come into her own in this scene. She is level-headed and is adopting some measure of smarts and strength.

The scene splits between the three young people going through the tunnel and Antigone and Polynices on a boat headed for Greece. The chemistry between them that must be there from the get-go is even stronger. They talk about their act as newlyweds and what their wedding would be like.

Ismene, Haemon and Eteocles decide that the best thing for them to do would be to head West and start a new life. They begin planning how they will get to their savings and make their way out there by train. So now we have two voyages: the trip to Greece by boat and the trip West by train.

The scene ends with a monologue by Tiresias where he talks about how everything is written in stone, that no one can alter the future by their actions. He doesn't say the siblings and Haemon will fail as such, however.

Some thoughts:

Like Checking Out, this show has lots of characters. Antigone, Polynices, Eteocles, Ismene, Haemon, Creon, Eurydice, Cora (a family friend--she is a malaprop and her name is a play on Chorus), and Tiresias.

Producers look for plays with small casts; you don't have to pay as many people. Musicals can have more characters because musicals have bigger budgets. Little community theaters love plays like Checking Out BECAUSE there are so many parts; the more the merrier. I find it really hard to write shows with small casts. I have written a one act, two character, unit set show. It was a beast to write. I like to set people up and let them talk--and the more people they have to talk to, the more interesting I think it is. So how can I reconcile this with what I know is a sticking point for professional theater? It wasn't always like this. We've had plays like The Crucible and Our Town and Streetcar. Those were, and are, successful plays even with their large casts. Maybe things will change, or maybe I'll get popular enough that professional theaters will take a chance on me.

But the bigger question is: What do I do now?

I have NO IDEA where to go with this. With CO, I had dreamed the whole play and sketched it out in longhand on paper that first early morning. Marriage began and ended with an image; all I needed to do was connect the dots. Drag was looser. It was more political and had a drive that moved it forward.

So this blog now exists to jog my brain into figuring out the shape of the play. I don't know where it's going, but when it gets there I'll be glad.

I know a few things: Antigone and Polynices will arrive in Greece while Ismene, Haemon, and Eteocles travel West. I kind of wanted Ismene to visit Oedipus (Oedipus at Colonus) but I don't think that's practical. So I may have to cut some lines about that in the tomb scene. It's Antigone and Polynices who have to go to Greece.

Is Oedipus going to be part of the play? I haven't decided that yet. Maybe he could be double-cast with Creon? I kind of like that idea.

I know it seems like I don't know what I'm doing, and maybe I don't. That's what this blog is now for--to help me find my way through the tunnel. Look for the light...

SOOO much to report! I haven't written in a long time because I wanted to store up a lot of news to make the entry really mean something. I often feel like this is just a record of things that happen in my life, and that's not always interesting. So I'm going to break it down.

Weight/fitness: I am down to 144 pounds! So happy about that. I LOVE the way I look in the mirror. Clothes that haven't fit for a long time are almost loose on me. I've saved money by "rediscovering" old clothes, notably a few cute miniskirts that have been too small for years!

I haven't kept up with my running and I haven't picked a race. So I'm kind of slacking in that department. It's been hard to really see myself as a runner. I know if I just get back into a groove it will come easier. The nice weather should help--I'm better outside than on the treadmill. I am working with Stephanie every week and trying to get to Interval and Strength and Stretch. We did power yoga in S & S one day and it actually wore me out!

Career: I'm tutoring young people trying to get their GED. When I originally wanted to teach a large part of my desire stemmed from a drive to help teenagers. I feel like I'm doing that now in an even more direct way. Most of the kids are driven to work, although we did have a boy walk out. He said he wanted to take the practice test, but when I came in to check on him he was gone.

Romance: It didn't work out with Lance. I just didn't feel any chemistry with him. I feel like he's too formal in person. I have made a connection with another guy who lives in Mason, which is nice because it's not too far from here. We're going to coffee soon, after the show closes. Which brings me to...

The Show: The rehearsal process has been interesting. The director cast the show very well, excellent voices in both leads and small parts. The chorus has worked hard and we have also shone. But there's been scheduling problems and we've only recently been able to rehearse with anything near a full cast. This makes rehearsals disjointed and hurts morale. We are getting closer as a cast and I think next week will bring everything into focus, both onstage and off. The best thing I can do is act and sing my part to the fullest.

And future theater: Auditions for Merchant of Venice are coming up the weekend after Guys and Dolls closes. I'm working on my monologue and I'm going to re-read the play. I really want Portia but I'd also just like to be in it. It would be fun to work with Mike again.

I also got a part without having to audition, which is always fun. Riverwalk is doing a show called "Conspiracy" in October. The show calls for one female non-speaking part. I didn't really consider auditioning. The director contacted me and offered it to me. I thought about it and decided it would be a good experience. I've worked with the director before as a fellow actor and I've seen his work in other shows. It's going to be a fascinating play. It's about the Nazis' "Final Solution". It is based on an HBO movie and has NEVER been performed on stage before. The author is actually coming to the show!!! So I will be part of something really wonderful.

Spirituality: Stephanie and I went to the meeting in March. We had a wonderful time. I feel like this is the right place for me. I'll be talking about it more as I go to more meetings.

And what else?...Spring is here, I think (never sure in Michigan). I got Mom a wonderful Mother's Day present and I will see her in a few weeks. Margaret is back working, focusing on testing, which she really loves. Dad had eye surgery to correct a detached retina, but he's doing fine. I worry that I will also have eye problems but my eye doctor took pictures of my retina the last time I was there and things looked good. Remya just got back from her anniversary trip to California and Vegas so the last time we met we looked at photos and talked. Lots of good things!

Hanging up now...

Change in the wind

Lots to report. My weight has stabilized at 147, 2 pounds from my goal. Am I asking too much to lose those last two pounds? Weighing 145 instead of 147 wouldn't really change how I look or how I feel. But it's a number I want to get to. People have continued to say how great I look and I know that's what counts, not a number. But it would be nice...!

I ran the longest I've ever run on the treadmill tonight. 5 minutes run, 1 minute walk, lather, rinse, repeat. I did a little over two miles. I ran slow--5.0 miles/hr. I wanted to run faster but I wasn't able to keep the cycle up at a faster speed. Stephanie had told me to slow down. I don't think I'll do really well this first race. Well, it's the effort that counts, right?

I'm in a show--Guys and Dolls at Holt and Dimondale Community Players. I'm one of the mission "dolls". I've only been to two rehearsals so far and I have this week off except Friday. The music director used to be the choir director at my old church. She left under kind of a dark cloud, and I decided to move on partly because of that.

I've been spending time with Lance, a guy I met on plenty of fish. He lives in Grosse Pointe. He's a financial advisor and has two little girls. We've been having a good time. He wrote me that I seemed nervous around him, which was interesting considering I thought he felt nervous around me. He has a writing persona that doesn't match with his face-to-face persona. Maybe we all present a different face online. I guess the best thing to do is to keep seeing each other and working it out.

The vet checked Spot's urine and found a great deal of bacteria. So back on antibiotics she goes. We've completed 4 days of a 14-day cycle. We're retesting at 7-10 days. I hope she's okay. She is such an important part of my life.

I'm not working with the kids right now. We lost our grant, so the program can't go on. It was heartbreaking telling the kids. They said things like "Why don't we have a fundraiser?" and "I'm going down there and telling them...". I tried to explain that we needed a lot of money and that the decision was final. At least we got to finish our videos and we had a "film festival" on the last day. That was at Leslie. Gardner was weird because there were a few boys that just came in out of nowhere on the last day, and they made the session difficult. They didn't seem to understand that it was over. Jen took some pictures and we saw their video as well.

The February ice storm made it impossible for Stephanie and me to go to Adrian but we're hoping to go in March. March 20th is the spring solstice so that will be a very special day. My "Lent wreath" didn't go up this year; instead, I will put up the spring wreath March 20th.

Change in the wind...

Hanging up now...

Woman on the Verge

Stephanie gave me a book to read called "The Dance of the Dissident Daughter". It's about a Southern Baptist woman's journey from conventional, confining Christianity to the sacred feminine. It's wonderful. I like it because it celebrates women as we are, not what we may be after death. The author discusses how we can come to see ourselves not as wives, daughters, and mothers, but as women. I'm really looking forward to the meeting. My reading was so positive and it spurred me on to this next step.

This past Wednesday was Anti-Bullying Day but you wouldn't have known it from our boys' group. One boy walked out and came back three times (one of those times he slammed the door) and another boy walked out and didn't come back. We didn't get anything done because they were fighting so much. The sad thing is that there were only a few negative boys in the whole group; the rest were getting along okay but they were drowned out by the negative attitudes of the others. The tyranny of the few.

My weight was up 1/2 pound, which doesn't really bother me, but I want to be at my goal weight by February 14 and I'm three pounds away. I have three days to lose it and I don't think I'm going to make it (it's not very healthy to lose a pound a day!).

Super Bowl party was fun. I really liked the Eminem-Chrysler-Detroit ad. It showed another side of Detroit and offered a message of hope. Anita brought Darby over and he howled with Mom. She got him started. It was a little embarrassing, but hey, it's my mom.

I want to bliss out in the sauna so I'll say by bye for now.

Hanging up now...

Storms and rumors of storms

We just survived the first wave--and hopefully the LAST wave--of Snowpocalypse 2011. It wasn't as bad as the weather people predicted. The snow started Tuesday night and continued through Wednesday. I stayed home yesterday, playing on FB, reading, and working out at the apartment complex clubhouse. I ran the entire workout this time. Felt great. Stephanie said I should just go slower on the run part so I ran more like an 11 minute mile rather than a 9 1/2 minute mile. No workout today. Strength and Stretch tomorrow. I decided I'm going to start a new tradition of getting in the Y hot tub after S & S and totally blissing out. Not tomorrow, however. Tomorrow I'm leaving for Kzoo for the weekend. I'm going to see my buddy Bailey and darling Darby. Oh, and watch the Super Bowl, of course ;)

The world continues to turn and change. I don't understand what's happening in Egypt. It just seems to be getting worse and worse. I'd like to think they can establish a democratic state, but I think there will be a lot of bloodshed and corruption on the way. Our fearless leader has a difficult road ahead of him as far as our role is concerned. How much can we help and how should we help? I really hope this doesn't become another Iraq. Part of me wants to say "Let them sort it out for themselves". At the same time, we have an obligation as a world superpower to reach out and offer our help or take a stand and withdraw our support until the country moves towards a democracy.

I did a reading last night on my spiritual journey. I wanted to know if I was headed in the right direction and how that direction would take shape. The Queen of Disks, the Priestess, and the 2 of cups all showed up. The Queen of Disks symbolizes the Earth mother, and the Priestess, well, that's pretty self explanatory. The two of cups symbolizes a romantic union and that was in the future position. There was also quite a bit about community and even leadership of a group. I took this to mean that I'm on the right track, and that I can find what I'm looking for in a more earth-centered, woman-centered discipline.

The presence of the two of cups intrigued me. It may mean a purely romantic union is coming through this community I'm going to find (or found?) or it could symbolize the union of ideas within a community. Stephanie meets with a goddess-centered group once a month and I texted her to ask when the next meeting was. She said they are meeting February 20th and March 20th (March 20th is the Spring Equinox). I guess there's a book I should read first so she is loaning that to me. I'm excited about all this!

When I was at Meijer stocking up Tuesday, I saw a woman who was in my prayer group before she moved on to another church. We were glad to see each other but I held back about my new spiritual direction. She wouldn't understand--she's very devout and sees only one way. I think it's important to remember there are lots of ways we can intersect that don't have to do with dogma. I wish people in religious wars could see that. No, we're not all the same, but we have similar experiences and feel the same repercussions that come from being human.

Rethinking my position on working out tonight--I think I will do elliptical and relax in the hot tub afterwards. Just a nice and easy recovery workout. C ya!

Hanging up now...

Disappointments, triumphs, and an eye toward the future

So the email I got from Walt started like this: "Sarah, I'm sure you're a nice person but..." Yeah, you know what's coming next. He said he just didn't feel any chemistry. Strange because I thought there was chemistry, but I guess it was one-sided. We will continue to be friends and we are still going to Ann Arbor to see Jeremy Kittell on February 27th.

I've continued to do readings and they've been interesting. Good things about my career, my theater, my commercial work. I'm trying to be handy with the cards so that I can do readings for others. I'm going to Kalamazoo for Super Bowl Sunday and Mom wants me to do a reading for her. She doesn't believe in the power of the cards, but she thinks it would be fun. I'm looking forward to it.

Disappointing workout tonight. I'm working on the treadmill trying to expand my aerobic endurance by running one more minute each week. It's a regimen Stephanie set up for me. This week I'm supposed to walk two minutes, run three minutes, and repeat for 30 minutes. I was only able to keep it up for 2 1/2 cycles. I then walked for another 5 minutes or so and then did 20 minutes on the Arc Trainer. So I kept moving for more than 30 minutes but it wasn't what I was supposed to do. I'm trying to look at it as a practice run.

I'm down to two pounds away from my weight loss goal. Exciting! Stephanie says I should shoot for being at my goal by Valentine's Day. More exciting: I lost 2 inches in my waist over the last 6 weeks. If I continue to lose 2" every 6 weeks, I will be at my waist size goal in 12 weeks. My fat % also went down. Good news!

LCP is doing Merchant of Venice this summer. Portia is one of my dream roles. Auditions will consist of a prepared monologue and readings from the script. Mike wants us to be flexible enough and strong enough in our monologues that we can take direction and stop and start. I will really have to know my stuff. I'm doing Kate's monologue from the end of Taming of the Shrew. It's a toughie--not memorization-wise, but subject-matter-wise. Portia and Kate are both strong characters, so I think the monologue will be a good choice for the show. And it's one of the only ones I could find that was 3 minutes long--he wants them to be 3-5 minutes. So long for a Shakespeare audition! Most of the auditions I have been to call for a maximum of two minutes.

I think I have a good chance at getting in--Mike has worked with me and I think we have a good professional relationship. The question is: Does he see me as Portia? I will have to work hard to show him I can do the role. If I do Portia, I will have played the trifecta of strong Shakespeare women: Beatrice, Lady Macbeth, and Portia. How wonderful that would be!

Here's to great parts and great playwrights.

Hanging up now...

Lights, camera, ACTION!

I got a tarot card reading last night. The cards said some strange things. My business came up and she said that was going to yield me success. But when I asked about Walt, the cards seemed off. At least, that's what I thought. The reader kept seeing that he was very busy and there was no clear indication that we would end up together. Maybe I just didn't want to believe the cards, but the reading indicated something I didn't see in our developing relationship.

However, when I talked to him last night, I found out that he had been very busy. He drove a car from work all over to empty the gas tank so they knew for sure how much the tank held. He then came home and got a workout in, but he didn't feel like it was a very good one because he was tired from the work he had done that day. I asked him if he was always busy or if he found time for himself and he said he was always busy.

I don't put much stock in readings. I think they're inaccurate and very much influenced by the reader. But it's fun to get them. I have a deck of my own and have been doing some readings on my own, just for answers to questions that are on my mind. I think I'm more open to things like this as I get farther away from Christianity.

The reading turned up some good things as far as my business; she said that would go well. And we had a great day today with the kids. The boys were amazingly cooperative and supportive of each other. A model day. We finished one video and are almost done with the other. I got to be in one as the teacher who one of the "heroes" gets to help.

And speaking of my burgeoning film career...I got my check from the commercial work today! My agent wrote me a nice letter thanking me for allowing him to represent me and he hoped this would be the first of many opportunities. How cool!

I had a dream about Bailey. He was lying on the floor shivering and I laid down next to him and covered him with part of my bathrobe. I guess my worry about him is affecting my subconscious. In the dream, I was able to comfort him. I hope he's feeling okay. Anita has posted some pictures on FB of Bailey and Darby playing. They are so sweet together!

Our friendships make all the difference sometimes.

Hanging up now...

All Around Us

Things have been going really well. Met Walt for lunch again today at a place called Beans and Cornbread. We had a great time. He has so many good qualities. I'm amazed he hasn't ever been married. He seems like a catch!

Had a great walk/run today. I did it on the treadmill at the gym because I'm doing a new program Stephanie gave me. It's four minutes of walking followed by one minute of running; repeat for half an hour. I was able to run a 9:22 minute mile...but only for a minute. My goal is to be able to run a 10 minute mile or less for thirty minutes. I'm doing this because I'm running a 5 K in May, and if I run a 10 minute mile, I'll come in at just over 1/2 hour. That would be good for a first race!

I've been doing a little digging into Pantheism. It's about turning towards nature and away from a God-centered view of the world. Both Emerson and Thoreau were Pantheists. I think it would be a good idea to go to Triple Goddess Bookstore and see if I can find any books on the subject. I'm due for a reading anyway!

Found out that Bailey has cancer. It makes me so sad. He's my buddy! He gets nodes on his skin that his vet removes, and I just didn't realize that was cancer. I have no idea how long he's going to live. I want to see him as much as possible before he goes. I'm glad Anita has Darby to fill a space in her life. The boys play together and Anita posted some pics of them playing on Facebook. So sweet!

I'm so glad my Spot is healthy. Her bloodwork turned out great; it always does. She has been more playful lately too. I've been taking more time to pet and love her. I know her days are numbered too.

Isn't it wonderful we have animals in our lives?

Hanging up now...

I'm bored out of my mind right now. I have that weird feeling like I'm supposed to be somewhere. But I don't know where. I've been sitting in front of FB since I got home from work, not doing anything. I need to be in a show or something.

Walt called last night. I guess it WAS too early for me to jump to conclusions. We talked for an hour. I learned a little bit about his musical tastes and more about his family. I asked him about kids and he didn't say he definitely wanted them. I think he feels like I do about kids--he likes them but doesn't have to have them.

Been thinking about spirituality. I may explore other ways of feeling something greater than myself. There are definitely forces created by nature; that is something we can experience directly. Seasons change, humans impact the environment in sometimes negative ways...I like to experience nature in all its different incarnations. I might go on the web and see what I can find along these lines.

Went to Interval today. I was hoping my legs wouldn't get too overworked but we did lots of jumping, squatting,and lunging. We did some weights work--not enough, in my opinion. I think it's best when I do a lot of weight-bearing exercise. I've observed that I lose more weight on weeks I do more strength training.

Okay, I'm going on the web and seeing what I can find about nature-centered beliefs. I'll have much to report back, I'm sure.

Hanging up now...

1-1-11

Today is the first day of 2011, and it's been cool. Last night was Joe's party and we all got decked out in all our fancy finery and belted out some ballads. I left pretty early--about 12:30. Just felt like calling it a night.

Today I got up before my alarm. This is a really good thing for me--I often WAKE up before my alarm, but GETTING up is another matter. I do love my sleep, especially in winter. But I rolled out of bed to feed the cat and myself.

I wanted to do something different for my first breakfast of the New Year, so I made myself an egg white omelet. I was actually able to fold it and get it out of the pan without making a big mess. So two things turning out well!

Then I saw the Spartans get stomped. Painful. I couldn't watch the last few minutes, it was so bad. I decided to run my bad feelings out. I ran the old path that I've been trying to conquer. I only walked a little bit. It felt great to know I could just get back into it like that! Only thing was I almost froze my ears off, so next time I'm wearing my hat.

Other than that, I've just been Facebooking and cleaning. Got the apt. picked up and dusted and ran the vacuum around a little bit. I also took out the trash and it smells good in here. Haven't had any more problems with the stinky smoker.

My lunch with Walt went really well; however, I haven't heard from him since. I may have been a little too forward when I proposed going his way next time--maybe I shouldn't have assumed there would be a next time. But he seems to like me and I like him. I have a tendency to overthink things like this so I know I should just be patient. It's so hard, though!

I asked people about their New Year's resolutions for 2011, and few seemed to have any. I didn't really make any either. I feel like my life is going in the right direction and I don't really see how things could be better, other than having a partner. That would be nice.

Since I got up (relatively) early this morning, I'm sort of drifting now. So I'll say, as I have before--

Hanging up now....